Target Of Interest Has A Man

So Your Target Has a Boyfriend…

A lot of times in the community, there are AFC’s that come up with questions that are specific and situational when in fact, most of the veterans in the community have answered the question a dozen times over.  Here we will be discussing one of the most asked about situations, “What if my target has a boyfriend?”

This question is asked time and time again and the answer given each time is generally along the lines of “Don’t ask about her boyfriend and game her like normal” Now this is sound advice for normal gaming and escalation but things can get complicated when it gets to the number close.  The reason is because women FEEL more than we do. 

A lot of times your target may give you IOI’s when you’re running solid game and when you go for a number close she flips like a pancake and says “I can’t give you my number, I have a boyfriend.”  This leaves you thinking “what the hell was with all those IOI’s?” 

It is likely that you did not do anything wrong, you just gamed her like normal, she was responding with IOI’s, but you did not get the number close; what happened?  Some people may think of this as part of the “numbers game” (where there’s a certain percent of women in an establishment who had a bad day, are not single, etc.)  While this MAY be the case, I’m here to say that there is SOMETHING you can do to dramatically increase your chances of Nclosing if not more. 

What Not To Do

You are in a 3-set, and your target is responding with IOI’s.  You are DHVing like normal and your target kinos for your attention.

You: “*DHV routine*”
Set erupts with laughter, target kinos

Her: “So how often do you wear this?  Can I keep it?”

You:  “My shades? I wear 'em all the time, esp. if someone is dull and I don’t want them to know I’m not looking at them *pull down shades*”

Her: “Shut up! *slaps arm*”

You: “So my friends and I are throwing a bash next week you should come along, it will be fun, let me get your number so we can make it happen.”

Her: “*smiles and looks around* I can’t give you my number….I have a boyfriend, sorry.”

You: “Oh that’s cool, he can come too.  *motioning phone towards target*”

Her: “I can’t”

You: “Alright, that’s cool.  It’s been fun ladies, but I gotta jet.”

She was responding with IOI’s so you were not doing anything wrong, what you did was what most PUA’s would do, right down to the exit.  She was genuinely interested in you and enjoyed your company, if she did not you would not be getting IOI’s.  You went for the Nclose and got shut out because of she had a boyfriend.  Was there a way around this? Yes, quite a few. 

 

What to Do

You: “*DHV routine*”
Set erupts with laughter, target kinos

Her: “So how often do you wear this?  Can I keep it?”

You:  “My shades? I wear ‘em all the time, esp. if someone is dull and I don’t want them to know I’m not looking at them *pull down shades*”

Her: “Shut up! *slaps arm*”

You: “So my friends and I are throwing a bash next week you should come along, it will be fun, let me get your number so we can make it happen.”

Her: “*smiles and looks around* I can’t give you my number….I have a boyfriend, sorry.”

You: “Oh alright *friendly smile*”
Turn to her friends

You:  “Well you guys are more than welcomed to come too, why don’t you give me your numbers, we can get the ball rolling and you guys can let her know what’s going on?”

Set: “Ok!”
Punches in numbers while you continue interacting with the set
You (absent mindedly passing your target the phone): “Alright last one”
Her: “*laughs* Alright, I guess it could be fun”

You: “Okay you guys, it’s been fun, see you ladies next week.”

Exit

Wait, What Just Happened?

Before I get into that you have to know that once she mentions her boyfriend your chances of success drop dramatically, and that is the reason a lot of PUA’s decide to eject from the set. 

On a conceptual level, here is how you succeeded:  You were interacting with a set and your target, the most beautiful one in the group, was interested.  Since you won over the one that always gets hit on, you almost automatically win over the other women; who may not be AS beautiful but are still attractive.  You read your targets IOI’s and decided to try a number close; this is where you get thrown a curve ball. 

You find out your target has a boyfriend.  She tells you this because she is interested in you and she now knows you are interested in her.  There could potentially be something between you two if you hang out again.  The act of your target giving you her number is an acknowledgment on her part that she is okay with something happening between you two, despite her boyfriend. 

Luckily you read this article before you interacted with this set and knew how to get over this obstacle.  You group closed and got the numbers of her friends first.  This works because now all of a sudden, you are not singling her out and though the interest is there, it is pushed aside because it turned into a “friendly interaction”. 

Now she can circumvent her ASD (anti-slut defense) and tell herself that she’s not technically letting anything happen by hanging out with you again because you’re just a fun guy who is being friendly and inviting them to hangout next week…whom she happens to be attracted to. 

Nutshell please?

So in short, you are circumventing her ASD by Group closing.  Once you do that she will no longer feel singled out and as far as she’s concerned the number exchange is purely on friendly terms…but to a friend she is attracted to.  She can tell herself anything that may happen between you two just happens and she did not “Consent” in any way prior.  Once you do that you have a green light to escalate.  Her boyfriend becomes a non-issue because as far as the two of you are concerned, things just happened.

Closing Notes

Now I am not telling you to go out and be a boyfriend-destroyer, that’s a sure way to end up with a few unwanted medical bills.  I am acknowledging the variable of group dynamics that sometimes may hinder you from taking things further with a genuinely amazing woman. 

Also, the dialogue in this article is just a medium with which to convey the concepts in the article.  I strongly recommend that you take the concepts from this article and integrate that information with your own personal game; otherwise you’re only going to know how to handle yourself in the above mentioned situation.  Good luck out there!

Anubis

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